13yr old son had 1st real bad Migraine - feel defeated

My son has been having smaller cluster migraines these past years and I've been quietly giving him Excedrin for Migraine and an icepack and allowing it to run it's course. Cluster headaches are usually gone in a day and I don't call any attention to them by labelling them a "Migraine" as I don't want to get it in his head that he has a handicap or that he will suffer as bad as his mother. I know he has to go through life regardless of what his body had dealt him and fortunately he doesn't have hormones to deal with.

Yesterday was different. The Excedrin didn't make a dent and I could see it in his face how bad it was and it turned my stomach. I gave him a Tylenol 3 to help him out a bit and it didn't do much. I had to finally face that he inherited this horrible monster. Here I was thinking that maybe in 30 years I would be dead and it would be over and now I see that it continues. What a stupid thought that was. Will he have to endure a lifetime of disappointments too? I dread to have to take him to the doctor and go on the tiraid of medications that I went on. In the end, not much worked for me other than strong pain killers.

I just want to cry.

Angela

I got tears in my eyes when I read your post. I have a 6 and 4 yr old and every time they say their head hurts my stomach does a little flip. I dread the thought of them having to deal with migraine. I understand how you are feeling at least a little bit. So sorry this is happening to him, my heart goes out to you both.

Jo

My son also got his first real migraine at age 13. It was horrible. I took him right in to the pediatrician and right as the doctor walked in, he vomited into the waste basket. A perfect way to get the point across! He was give pain meds and monitored. Luckily he didn't have them often. Just a few times a year.

By the time he was 18, he was only getting auras, but no pain. He is now 26 and rarely has an attack. He just gets an aura and a little nausea. No horrible pain which I am so thankful for. It is common for boys to get them during puberty as their hormones are changing, then they ease up. I pray that it is the same for your son. It is horrible to watch our children battle this disease.

My daughter was horribly chronic through puberty and she told me the other day that she isn't getting menstrual migraines anymore and just has them with weather changes. I am thrilled that she is doing so much better. I was afraid that she would be like me but at 21, she is off meds and Excedrin Migraine seems to abort most of her attacks. The others, she sleeps through as she refuses to take anything stronger.

My heart is hurting for you but there is hope fir the future.

(((Hugs)))

Thanks Jo and Alli. Hugs so appreciated.

Alli, it is so reassuring to hear that it could be a puberty outburst and the worst of it could be the next few years and not a lifetime of it. We can live with that. I would have loved to have had a girl but in this matter, I'm glad I had boys.

Angela

Oh Angela, I'm so sorry.

My 25 year old son developed M's about 5 years ago. The guilt is crushing. But, I'm thankful that Imitrex works for him and he doesn't get them very often. I know he's really doing poorly when he'll accept one of my "good" pills and go and sleep it off.

ALMOST, I had M from 10-12 years old. they went away till I was 39 and stayed till I was 45. M 4-5 a week.. Hope your son does alot better than that.

I am truly sorry to hear about this. I do hope you will take him to the doctor. Please don't assume that this is the same as you. Have him checked. Please don't think the worst. I am a mother also. I feel in my heart how you are feeling.

I'm so sorry Angela. I can only imagine how hard that must be on you. I had never thought of it much before I had my little girl as my migraines were never chronic pre-childbirth but there are deep migraine genes on both her sides of the family. My side is horribly chronic. I am wracked with guilt already and dread the day she comes to me and says, "Mommy, my head hurts."

On the other hand, I am so happy knowing that we ARE making advancements (however small they may be..they are there!) in the field of medical knowledge and hopefully within their lifetimes they will see great benefits from that. At least I know I can take her to the doctors and get her care, however exhausting it may be..at least they can get help and every migraine is different. You never know what'll be the key.

I'll be thinking of you and your son. Please let us know how he is doing if you don't mind.

I "inherited" my migraines from my dad................today I went with my 23 year old daughter to a neuro-opthamologist for a second opinion on her migraines. I feel incredibly guilty that I have passed this condition on to her. We have discussed this and she reassures me that she does not blame me and in fact she is thankful that she has been able to watch me keep moving forward while still dealing with my migraines. We can hold their hands, empathize with their symptoms and assure them that they are not alone................

Angela,
don't feel guilty. No one has perfect genes.
I inherited migraine from my grandma, but NEVER saw her as the culpirit. I've rather always considered her as one of the closest member of my family and the one who best could understand me

Thank you for taking the time to reply, everyone. I was doing fine when I was in the land of denial but facing the truth is a big kick in the butt.

Thanks for the support.

Angela

Headache in adolescents(and younger children) is a major problem, leads to alot of lost school/activities, etc. We just wrote a new article on Mngt of Headache in Adolescents(may be on our site, not sure if it is up quite yet)...we do have quite a bit on this subject on the site, http://www.headachedrugs.com under archived articles, and also in the Adolescent section of(it is a free download) Headache 2008-2009. Larry Robbins,M.D.

Thank you, Larry

How are you and your son doing? I went through quite an ordeal with Sarah and school so if at any time you want to talk about how to deal with the schools and teachers, just send me a PM. it is so hard when your baby hurts. I hope his attacks are few and far between.

Alli

My son hasn't attended school since 6th grade because of his migraines - he's 16 years old now. I'm considering just having him take the GED and at least have that. We don't always get a lot of home schooling accomplished with his frequent headaches....which just adds more stress to everyone (ie: my son, me and my husband). It is so hard.

My daughter was on Independent Study from her sophmore year to graduation. We fought with the school continuosly until we put her in IS. They didn't even want to tell me about IS. They just badgered me about truancy and getting a doctors note for EVERY migraine, even though we had a letter from her doctor stating her medical constraints. Like I was really going to get a doctor's note every day or so! Get real.

Most of her teachers treated her like she was just a slacker even though she passed her tests. She wasn't "participating" so her grades were awful. Once she went on IS her grades went from F's to A's. Some slacker. She graduated with a 3.5 GPA. Her IS teacher was a godsend.

Alli