ever feel like this......

I have never been
the person I was meant to be
for some hidden reason
I may never discover
my fate altered
half a lifetime ago
and I became
a broken body
crying within
and without
hope....

I have thought that I could have been more and done more things if I had not suffered from migraines since I was eight. I could have made straight A's in school. I could have been much more.

However, I have done alot in my life time. I became a pilot, an electrical engineer, even a scientist. I have traveled around the world. I have wonderful children and grand children. I have gotten laws passed at the state capital in Oklahoma. I have made positive changes in other's lives. I have done many other things too many to list here.

I did all of this while suffering migraine pain most of my life, in spite of the pain. Yes, I could have done more, but I did not let it keep me from doing what I could. I am still learning new things and doing new things and will do so until I die.

Thankyou for your thoughts. You have done so much. You must be admired by many. And deservedly so. Perhaps the migraines sperded you on? Who knows. They are a strange creature.

Gailgigi,

No admiration. My point is do not let it get the best of you. You can do much in spite of these horrible migraines. I know, everyone is different. I have been to the point of "No Hope" more times than I can remember, but I have been around for 63 years and have learned that you can still accomplish more than you might think at the moment. Just trying to encourage you not to give up. In between the real bad times, do as much as you can.

I realize you may have been saying don't give up. And giving encouragement. However, I don't, at this time, have any good days. Chronic Daily Headaches are my situation. Getting continually worse for the past 11 years. To the point of crippling. No life. However, I have now had one appointment with a pain clinic. So, we'll see what happens. No pain medication. Why? I've only recently asked for it and was turned down. Why? Who knows? The journey continues. Some days I have hope. Others, well you've read the poem. I still believe you deserve admiration. Whether you do or not. (:

Thanks Gail, I will humbly accept. I was on Amatriptyline for some time and it seemed to work. When I got up to 75mg tabs, it became the source of my headaches. I quit taking it and now have a few headaches a week instead of constant ones. I think I will never get rid of these horrible things.

I will pray for you and wish you the best. Be persistant about pain pills and preventatives and ask for explanations on everything.

May God Bless.

Hal

What a nice message. I've tried Amatripilyn (forgive the spelling) It gave me nocturnal panic attacks. To an extreme. For some unkown reason I sometimes have paradoxical effects from certain medications. Usually anti-depressants. I know it works for some people. I've just purchased some Butterbur online. I'll give it a try. Have you tried it?

Gail,

I do not know much about Butterbur. It sounds like something one might get stuck with hiking the grasslands of Oklahoma. I hope it helps. How does it work?

I am going on an archealogical dig this Thursday in southeastern Oklahoma for a week. I will be taking a travel trailer and camping near the dig site. I will also be taking a bottle full of pain pills just in case. The site is near a small lake so I will also be doing some fishing. Hopefully I can catch enough fish to keep me fed for most evening meals.

Hal

That sounds wonderful! Sounds like my version of heaven. I hope you don't have any pain problems. All I know (so far) about Butterbur is that it is a herb. Supposedly no problematic side effects. (one never knows for sure though) Used widely for migraine. Helps some. Does not help others. Have a great time on your trip!