The "Golden Years"

This is for us "older" folks on this forum (don't want to scare the young ones) but whoever came up with the phrase "golden years" for when you hit a certain age, there is absolutely nothing "golden" about it! I hate getting older and for whoever said it is the best time of your life they must have had a crap young life. I'm not even at the "golden Years" age yet (I don't think--don't know what that would be), and I see not one positive thing about getting older except maybe retirement (if we are even going to be able to do that).

Don't get me wrong. I'm a positive upbeat person and actually very happy. However, I don't see me getting "happier" entering the "golden years". Anyone out there that thinks it's great?

OMG Linda, I'm struggling with this very thing and your post popped up. At times I am okay with it and I'm thinking I'm pretty good for my age, and then I'm totally depressed and struggling with an anxiety attack from hormones. I see seniors on a regular basis and they seem perfectly happy but I don't know how they got there. When I ask, they just smile, pat my hand and say I'll be all right. I don't see retirement as a good thing. I see declining health and boredom and burying loved ones and possible poverty the way the economy is going.

Maybe a visit to the library to get a book on the subject would help. If no one else responds to this post (or just a few) maybe we can do a little PM chat.

Today our company is having a street hockey game in the parking lot. I am raring to go as usual and my boyfriend says "be careful, you're not as young as you used to be". I hate hearing that. Last time I scored on guys half my age.

Angela

"How can I be 'over the hill' if I haven't 'made it to the top'?"

I know I'm nowhere near this age. But many of my friends are getting into their 40's and 50's and it's a bit different - they look at things with a bit of "wiser" eyes. Life experiences that I haven't had and are a wealth of advice.

I guess, from my standpoint anyway, that the "golden years" are a chance to do all the things that I couldn't do (lack of money, other commitments, etc) at my current age. Some days I feel that I'm already to that point. Wanting to do the things I can't because of this dratted disease. The only benefit is that I'm not getting up a million times to pee and still have my normal hormonal cycles.

Looking at my family history - aging is not something I'm looking forward to. I know I'm going to have arthritis, have to watch my heart health, be conscientiously screened for cancer, deal with increasing tremors and there will probably be a few others that I won't see coming. But I've also decided not to wait to do the things I would during retirement. Sort of like waiting to use your fancy soap in the bathroom and it collects dust for so long and the occasion never happens.

But to add to this thought - someone once told me high school was the best time of your life. Apparently they didn't go to high school - it was h e l l for me and not for health reasons.

Angela - PM chat sounds great.

Heelerlady - "High school being the best years of your life" -- I feel sorry for anyone that thinks that, and I had a great high school life. I've also had a great rest of my life. And yes, you do get wiser as you age "somewhat" but being wiser doesn't necessarily mean happier. And I agree with you--do things now, don't wait. I have always lived by that. I know too many people who saved for retirement and then dropped dead or were too unhealthy to enjoy it.

And, don't get me wrong. At this moment of my life I am very happy and content. I just don't see getting older and older as a great enough thing to be called "the golden years". Even though I am healthy (except for the migraines), poorer eyesite, wrinkly skin, sagging skin, gray hair, old age ailments, slower memory--"golden?". I would rather be less wise and more carefree. I'm not quite there yet, so maybe I am wrong. I think part of it is being a babyboomer also. We don't age very well. We want to stay young.

Estre,

I know what you mean. Wiser doesn't mean happier...but as a younger person, we look to you for advice. I know I don't have it all figured out...I've probably just barely scratched the surface on things. It is sort of like this forum, there are people who have been dealing with M for decades and others who have been months. I come here for advice on things as this is new to me, but may be old hat to you.

Looks...well if you ship me some of your wrinkles, I'll ship you some of my youth (I'll even take a gray hair or two). I'd like to not be mistaken for a student - this happens all the time at work and gets frustrating. I know everyone tells me to enjoy it, but I get tired of not being taken seriously because I look like a kid. I'm also looking forward to turning 30 this year - my 20's haven't been very good for me and a whole new decade with a bit more knowledge. The memory - well mine's shot too but it's either been the drugs or pain numbing it but I do miss my photographic memory (granted this left after a head injury when I was 17 or so).

Hi

Estre, it's strange on here isn't it. I was so surprised when you included yourself in the 'older folks' as your posts don't sound 'old'!

I think the Golden Years are a bit bronze here or even rusty I'm 52 and my quality of life is just so lame at the moment. I get to work part-time when I can but the rest of the time is spent battling the darn head. I try to be positive and make the most of the better times but they are very limited. I spend far too much time at home and there's only so much excitement can be got from doing things in the house

I'm just hoping the migraines will stop while I've still got the energy to paint the town red!

And I hope that for all of us

Liz

bump

I have a lot to say on the subject but don't have the time at the moment. Not to be a wise ass, but you know what the alternative to "getting older" is. That doesn't seem like a good choice.

Chris

LizzieB - Glad I don't sound old. I don't think of myself as old.

Chris - I hear ya. Why call it the "Golden years" though? That is what this is about--the term. That, to me, implies the better part of your life. I can't imagine it is going to be the best part of my life. Maybe I'll win the lottery and travel the world. Then, maybe.

Alright, I'll just stick to discussion the term and not all the issues around ageism. I only researched it a little and couldn't find much of anything about the history of the term.

My own theories -

It's used sarcastically. It's true meaning is opposite of what the words suggest. It's used as an arrogant insult to seniors.

It was coined as an advertising slogan to entice folks to move to retirement communities.

Chris

Golden Years...... pppppppppttttttttt! If I keep going hte way I am..... they won't be very golden. I need to win a financial lottery AND a medical lottery for that to happen!

alli wrote:I need to win a financial lottery AND a medical lottery for that to happen!

Now what is the medical lottery? Are my odds any better with that than the financial one?

How depressing Chris.

Golden....hmm is that what they say? Well it must be just gold leaf.
Since I had that wonderful landmark birthday, I am trying to laugh at the fact that I can now get reduced entry to places.
Wouldnt that be good if \I could actually go anywhere.

Nothing good about it from my perspective.
I have 3 chronic illnesses which I have tried so hard to improve on.
I stupidly gave myself until my birthday from my last one.
Well, I got worse.....

So now I am even older and still in the same situation.
No life quality and constant pain.

I am not meaning to sound depressed....hey I haven't gone gray...
But I cant see anything golden about getting older...

Linda, hang in there, the birthday itself isn't so bad....
Soon over and done with.

Well I think I was just born in the wrong year. They used to say "life begins at 40" and just as I was about to hit 40, they said "50 is the new 40".
So I had another ten years to wait.
I'm just about to hit 50, so I'm betting within the next 12 months some bright spark will say "60's the new 50" and I'll be screwed for another 10 years.

Not to be a wise ass, but you know what the alternative to "getting older" is.

Trust Risa not to know that [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

what is the alternative, please?

Risa

Risa,

It's death:)!

I'm not so concerned about getting old as getting rid of the migraines. If the migraines will cease in old age, bring it on. I just hope my brain holds up and the illness doesn't destroy it. I don't have any concrete reason for thinking this, I just worry about it sometimes.

Well I am still getting older and the migraines are not getting any better.
I dont have enough years left to keep waiting for that...This is my life and as far as I know, its the only one I get..

As the song says "Just want to live while I'm alive"

Bring on those golden years. To me the golden years are those we look forward to when we will be able to take things easy and do what we want at our own pace.

I suppose this is always going to be relative. For some people the slowing down will be to a pace that's still more than is usual for the rest of the population. A guy I know has just taken early retirement at 62 and completed a cycle ride from Wales across Europe and Asia to Turkey and is now about to start another long distance ride this summer. Good for him.

I used to have ideas of travelling the world and basically wearing myself out but sadly migraine steals our dreams like any other chronic disease so now I don't set my sights too high! I look forward to not having to worry about letting down work colleagues and family. Just being able to live selfishly at my pace. Living like a slob when I'm not well, growing a bit of veg in the garden, letting the grass grow, going out in the fresh air on a good day, and riding my motorbike when I feel like it.

I don't worry about getting older. I worry more about being incapable. I certainly won't be rich in my old age but, as you can see, I don't want much.

lol

Thanks for an explanation. It didn't occur to me !

Risa

CluelessKitty wrote:

Not to be a wise ass, but you know what the alternative to "getting older" is.

Trust Risa not to know that [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

what is the alternative, please?

Risa

Specifically, suicide - taking the matter into one's hands. I can guarantee it will prevent one from getting any older.

Chris

I asked my partner what the term "Golden Years" means to him. He said, "Oh you mean when you're thrown out of your job and you have to eat dog food?"

Chris

"Oh you mean when you're thrown out of your job and you have to eat dog food?"

roftlmao

bingo!!!

Risa

I see the Golden Years as finally having the opportunity to do what I love the best. SLEEP. Unfortunately between aching joints and a pea bladder I can only make it five hours at a stretch. I remember those blissful days of youth, sleeping til noon. Now even on my days off I'm up by 7:30 am. However the mid day nap is lovely.

lolol to Char's remarks, too.
you forgot about not being able to move from side to side as freely as before as well

Risa