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how did you meet your partner?

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nursebeth
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Post  Paradox Sun Jun 13, 2010 7:38 am

Didn't want to hijack Vickis thread but Olee and Ivys post got me interested. How did you meet you partner?

I met mine on a blind date. I was living in a new town and only knew people from work. one of the women was dating an identical twin and was tired of the other twin tagging along on all their dates. She asked me to go on a blind double date. I said no, I didn't "do" blind dates.

I was talking to my Mom about it and she said "Your not going to go so you sit at home by yourself and watch TV alone, AGAIN?" Okay, good point Mom.

Love at first sight? Nope. Hubby had terrible teeth. but, he ended up being so sweet. The clincher was when he dropped me off and was so nervous he just gripped the steering wheel and stared straight ahead when he asked me out again. it was so refreshing from being mauled on a first date.

And those teeth? After dating six months I convinced him to take out a loan and fix them. Now the great thing is Im married to a looker and he doesn't know it cause he was always so self conscious about his teeth ( it took him years to get past the habit of putting his hand over his mouth when he spoke).
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Post  pen Sun Jun 13, 2010 8:41 am

We met Christmas 1966. Walking in the snow in bare feet.....
Me, my cousin and a friend, bumped into my neighbour and 3 other guys.
I dated his friend for a while, and then another friend.
Then we dated for a few months, then he dumped me!!! affraid

3 years and a few boyfriends later one Saturday he called me.
He was renwewing his drivers licence and found my number.
My mum had always said "he'll be back". I really didnt care....
So when he called we did meet, and we were great platonic friends for months.

One night coming back from a day out with friends in their car, we became, lets just say, less platonic.
We got engaged in 1970 and married Sept 1971
Still together. Not been all fun, had otr ups and downs, but he'll do for now.
I do introduce him as my first husband....you never know. cheers

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Post  Brent Sun Jun 13, 2010 10:42 am

I was the senior EMT on an ALS MICU ambulance and was in charge of orienting/training all the new paramedics. One of the local firefighters was a girl that was known to be a wee bit on the ditsy side. We were all shocked to hear she got into paramedic school. Nobody gave her a snowball's chance at graduating since over half the students washed out.

Well she did and was hired with my ambulance company. At that point I was pretty burned out from always training new people and never having anyone to watch my back. I had to watch mine and theirs. So when I found out she was hired I was ready to quite. I actually was already hired to work as an EMT in Barrow AK. But my gramps worked there for several years and talked me out of it.

So I resigned myself to have to train yet another newbie. I was also recovering from two previous relationships with crazy women. So I was taking a break from the female species for a little while. And most of you know that's when you meet that special person, when you stop looking.

It became apparent that paramedic school changed her a lot. This was not the person we all knew a year earlier. She turned out to be a top notch medic and surprised everyone. Probably even herself.

That was 23 years ago and this Aug will be our 20th wedding anniversary. In my experience and from observing so many others the secret to meeting the right person is stop looking. It just frustrates and stresses you out. You then keep lowering your standards out of desperation. And that is the perfect recipe for finding all the wrong people.

Let destiny and Karma work for you.
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Post  lesherb Sun Jun 13, 2010 11:16 am

I met my husband on AOL. I instant messaged him, as I was searching for people who were online at the moment, who had my last name. He didn't know about instant messaging at the time (he used his computer for computing instead of a social vehicle like I did).

We became friends then, over time got very interested in one another. He drove 450 miles to meet me (very scary when you think about it). After many visits, I moved in with him and we were married about 2 years after we met.

So, I got my last name back (this is my 2nd, and final, marriage). It would have been easier to just change my name but then I wouldn't have this wonderful guy in my life I love you

And as far as meeting my first husband? I did it the old fashioned way.....I met him in a bar! LOL
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Post  Mianna Sun Jun 13, 2010 11:24 am

Member of the same last name club here too!
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Post  survivor Sun Jun 13, 2010 8:34 pm

At our little school we had a middle school for 6th and 7th grade. We went to the high school in the 8th grade. My husband had the same lunch as I. He also had a crush on my best friend.

The "went together" off and on for the next two and half years. It was a tumultuous relationship. She would dump him and as soon as he got involved w/ someone else she wanted him back.

I didn't like him. He was always in the way and fairly arrogant. He didn't like me. I was always in the way and he thought I was homely.

She had dumped him - yet again- when I called him to borrow a calculator for an exam. He ended up asking me out.. I thought it would be just one date. That was March 1981. We got married in February 1983.

I like to say I married my best friend's boyfriend. We aren't friends anymore. My mom said I got the better end of the deal. Mom always felt Jo used me a lot. Mike says he got the better deal, too!

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Post  Brenda Mon Jun 14, 2010 1:05 am

Frank and I also met via AOL IM. He was laid up with a bad back (the first time around.) He couldn't get out of bed for 3 weeks. He got really bored and his friend told him he should try talking to people on IM to pass the time. He talked to a few people, and he said when he read my profile, I looked "normal." Boy did I have him fooled. LOL

He sent me his first message as I literally had my finger on the button to shut down my computer for the night. I almost didn't answer, but a little voice (to this day, I believe it was God guiding me) telling me that this could be someone very special. Don't blow him off. We talked on-line for a little while. I never did this, but I gave him my phone number that first night. We talked on the phone from midnight until 2 am.

The next night he called again and we talked from midnight until 6 am. I had no idea what time it was until I saw light in my window. I pulled the curtain back to see what it was and it was the sun coming up. Ooops. LOL We talked every day. He came up to meet me the next weekend. From that day, we never missed a day talking to each other. He proposed the first time just 3 weeks after we met. About 3-4 weeks later, he proposed again and I accepted. We got married 7 months later. That was over 10 years ago.
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Post  Almostangela Mon Jun 14, 2010 8:48 am

My first encounter was at a christmas party for kids. There were teens acting up in the hall and this guy in a deep voice yelled at them to take off. His voice was so distinctive.

A few years later, there was this brown car that had 'fish killer' written on the back of it. I thought how silly and drove by and got a look at him and thought he was so cute, and that was it, because I was married.

A few years later, I had a sporting goods store, and he came in with a friend and I tried to sell them a bow set. The friend wouldn't shut up and he only said a few words.

Six months later he came in the store alone and bought fishing tackle but I could hardly get a few words out of him and when he left I felt so sad and didn't know why

Six months later my marraige fell apart and we underwent seperation. It was a long separation that took a year and a half as my ex became obesessive.

Six months into this I was in a morning community chat online with mostly women and for a month I was talking to this fellow that was real nice (and the only one that wasn't talking dirty). I agreed to call him but I was nervous as all get go. I hid my number from him and called. I recognized the voice immediately. The call block didn't work and he suddenly knew who I was because my store name came up! We were both shocked! I didn't know that he had a crush on me.

Well, I was still in a marraige and had enough stress so we agreed that that had to be ended first and that took a year. Then I was concerned that maybe I was jumping from one fire to another. So I said a prayer and asked God to give me a sign that this guy that I kept bumping into all these years was the one for me.

So, the day that I was moving out to my new apartment.......I went to make my last load........and there at my neighbours, who was moving that day also, in the moving van, was my guy, working on that truck that day, oblivious to the fact that I lived next door. Our eyes met and I knew I had the sign.

We've been together for 8 years now and I've never been happier.
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Post  crt Tue Jun 15, 2010 9:36 am

At an airport, of course! I wasn't looking for a relationship. I wasn't even looking for a data. I was at the airport because I love flying and airplanes. He was there for the same reasons and he wasn't looking for a woman either.

Chris


Last edited by crt on Tue Jun 15, 2010 12:15 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post  Brent Tue Jun 15, 2010 10:06 am

These are all great stories and I hope it gives hope and assurance to any single people here that when it's meant to happen it will. Even if you are not looking sometimes.
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Post  nursebeth Tue Jun 15, 2010 11:13 am

encouraging stories!!!!
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Post  pen Tue Jun 15, 2010 11:36 am

So what advice to we have for my two gorgeous lovely daughters aged 34 and 29....
They are not career women, they want family.....where should they look??

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Post  Brent Tue Jun 15, 2010 12:30 pm

IMHO, don't look, it's just frustrating. Become engaged in life with a sport or hobby that exposes you to other people. In my experience and observing so many others around me it happens when you least expect it.
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Post  newtothis Tue Jun 15, 2010 12:45 pm

Very interesting reading!

I was leaving a 10 year relationship where everything was "ours" we just didn't have that little piece of paper. We were putting our house on the market but I wanted to have the bathroom finished first as I already had everything for the job sitting in my basement - we just hadn't had the work done yet. We figured it would be a good selling point. Anyhow, I called my father because he was currently having work done to ask who he was using. He put the son (father son construction business) on the phone. He told me that they would stop by to take a look.

A month later he called to say they'd be stopping by to take a look at the job. I told him "Good! you can meet the guy I hired to do the job because I got tired of waiting on you and your father to stop by." Laughing

I had been country line dancing with a couple friends and my dad and step mom had been country line dancing with a group of their friends elsewhere. My group split up so I went with my dad and SM one night and she introduced me to everyone - including the guy that didn't get the job! Shocked

Our first exchange was less than friendly and we carried on with our separate evenings.

The next week my dad was out of town and "the guy" called to see if I wanted to ride with him. Very Happy

We ended up going and staying up until the wee hours just talking. After that he "stalked" me for a while and I finally gave in and went out with him. We were married 9 months later and now have a wonderful son and are in our 16th year! Hey - if you can't chase them off - join them! When he asked me to marry him I didn't know what I was going to say until I opened my mouth and it came out! I have no regrets!
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Post  crt Tue Jun 15, 2010 2:49 pm

Brent wrote:IMHO, don't look, it's just frustrating. Become engaged in life with a sport or hobby that exposes you to other people. In my experience and observing so many others around me it happens when you least expect it.

Brent I was thinking exactly the same thing. So true!

Chris
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Post  lostinobx Tue Jun 15, 2010 3:15 pm

I use to love telling people how I met my...uhhh....ex on AOL. But this was back in the early 90's before there were the dating sites like there are now. Back then, people didn't talk about it like they do now, or at least they didn't where I am from.

We met in one of the chat rooms and use to talk daily hours at a time. Talked for about 7 mths before we actually met in person. By that time I felt as if I had known him my whole life. (wish I knew then what I know now). Wink

We met in person - he lived in MD and I lived in VA, so the distance wasn't that bad. We dated for a year before we finally moved in together. Got married about 8 mths later and was married for 9 years.

So the online thing does work. Although mine ended in divorce, I think I would give it (meeting someone online) another shot today. Especially at my age, beats hanging out at bars!

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Post  pen Tue Jun 15, 2010 3:22 pm

Brent wrote:IMHO, don't look, it's just frustrating. Become engaged in life with a sport or hobby that exposes you to other people. In my experience and observing so many others around me it happens when you least expect it.

Thanks Brent, I shall impart your pearls of wisdom.

And Chris, well if you think it too. They are getting a bit worried. Especially the older one...

P

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Post  Brent Tue Jun 15, 2010 4:18 pm

Pearls? I have always looked at them as doughnut holes. Rolling Eyes
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Post  pen Tue Jun 15, 2010 5:29 pm

Brent wrote:Pearls? I have always looked at them as doughnut holes. Rolling Eyes

Oh no Brent definitely valuable advice. Smile


The phrase probably comes from two sources. Matthew 7:6 refers to casting pearls ( i.e. the wisdom of the gospel) before swine; and the poet James Russell Lowell refers to the Rubayyat of Omar Khayam:
"These pearls of thought in Persian gulfs were bred,
Each softly lucent as a rounded moon;
The diver Omar plucked them from their bed,
Fitzgerald strung them on an English thread.
"

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Post  Brenda Tue Jun 15, 2010 6:05 pm

I agree with Brent. I was 34 and had NEVER had a date. When I gave up and said, forget it. I'm just going to be happy living my life.... that's when I met my wonderful husband. When it's meant to happen, it'll happen.
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Post  pen Tue Jun 15, 2010 6:42 pm

Brenda,
Glad it worked out for you. my elder daughter has had severe IBS and it has crippled her confidence, and meant she hasnt been able to work for a year....she is qualifying in another direction now and can be her own boss, so hope that helps her.
All the blokes her age seem to have a kid or two by now, and she has got left behind. It hurts me.. All she ever wanted was to have kids....about 4 she hoped and the body clock is ticking and I think she is losing hope. Nothing I can do, but it makes me sad.

The younger one had a boyfriend for 10 years, they were engaged and he dumped her. Apparently his family loyalties were stronger than his love for her. She hasnt found anyone since.

I know your advice is good, but there is no dating culture in England and it doesn't help.
I was married at 21, all of their friends are settled, their brother is a daddy. I think it really hurts...

Thanks
Pen

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Post  milo Wed Jun 16, 2010 10:03 am

I'd have the kid on my own if I felt that strongly about having kids. OR, both your daughters could raise their children together. Anyone could use the support of a close sibling while trying to rasie a child.

I agree with everyone else though about stopping the search. Nothing is less appealing on a fisrt date then finding out that your date already has a wedding dress and names picked out for her firts three kids. It's too much pressure!
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Post  pen Wed Jun 16, 2010 10:50 am

Actually they dont search at all. I think they gave up.
And they certainly dont exude that kind of desperation.
It is very different in England, if you date two different people you get called some rather unsavoury names.
It wasnt like that when I was young, but since now everyone assumes its sex on the first date....

They are a bit too shy for their own good I think.....like their mother. affraid

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Post  VickiG Thu Jun 17, 2010 12:56 pm

Brent and Chris, it's nice to say that you shouldn't go looking for someone, but when my life consists of trips between the doctor's office and my bed, with periodic evenings watching a DVD with my mother, I don't get many opportunities to meet men. I do have my international student evenings, but they are all a lot younger than I and not Christians. After dating a Muslim last time, I think I'd rather stick with someone who will support me in my wanting to be a Christian.
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