Having one of those days...again

So I am on about week 9 of this horrible migraine and I am tired of fighting. I know I have to keep pushing on as I awlays have but I'm not sure how much more I have in me.

I had a meeting with my supervisor at work the other day and I am on a written final warning meaning essentially that if I am 10 minutes late to work it's goodbye job. In a way though I can't say that I would be upset if that happened.

Still not able to keep much food down. I have lost about 20 pounds in a month and a half. Now I can stand to lose some weight but this is not what I had in mind. My gastro doc has no idea why I can't keep anything down. Apparently my stomach doesn't like me either. I think my body has started a revolt against me.

Anways I needed to rant and I know you all will listen. I am tired of hearing that I don't look sick and that all I need to do is to take an aspirin. If that would fix everything trust me I would have done that 12 years ago!

Hope everyone is hanging in there.

So sorry Becky.

It is so hard when we're trying to juggle work and headaches.

((((Becky)))))

Ah, girlfriend, wish I could take you away from all of that. Where is you doctor in all of this? Are you getting proper care? Do you need another doctor? 9 weeks a long time without relief.

I have so many questions of concern and you are just asking for sympathy. Hang in there, answers are coming if you keep pushing for them.

You have mine and I'm sending you a blast of prayers.

Angela

Keeping you in my prayers, Becky. Please keep your hope up.

Hang in there Becky.

I know it gets old and in a big hurry. I haven't felt okay in 5 days now and what I mean by okay is not ready to reach for the pills. I know you don't have that option and know how miserable it can be.

Something about pain and the stomach. Mine doesn't like pain either. I talked my neuro into some compazine and that helps. Just throwing it out there if you haven't tried it (it just quiets nausea). I also do Ensure when I feel awful. That way I get some calories and my stomach can't get too upset.

Sending a hug your way - and hope things let up for you.

Becky

I haven't been on time regularily for months and months. Luckily my bosses are ok about me running a few minutes behind. It is so hard to get up and dressed when you wake up with a migraine and/or Fibro pain. If I didn't have such great bosses I would have been fired a couple of years ago. I hope things work out and you keep your job. Isn't it discrimination to fire someome for health issues? Can your doctor work with HR to have you work within the guidlines for health disabled employees?

I wish it was easier to get disability so that we could get work accomodations easier. But having to be out of work completely for a year before you can even apply is so stupid when some of us CAN work part time and be (semi) functioning members of society. Am I wrong in this or is there a way to get termed disabled so that you can work within the guidlines? It would be good to know as too many of us are in this boat, which is rapidly sinking.

Alli

Well I did get a call from my neuro doc today that my MRI was normal and that my doctor was successful in getting my insurance to agree to pay for my Botox.

Even though this sounds great I am now on the "injection list". It seems my doc is the only one for about 45 miles in our area that does Botox injections for migraines. This means I now have to wait until at least mid august.

He is trying to fit me in sooner but we have to order botox and one stipulation from insurance was that I give topamax that I am on now the 6 weeks to see if it works. Doc has already said it won't work if I can't get rid of migraine I already have.

Having the Botox approved may turn out to be ironic cause at the rate of me being sick and having to get up from my desk and run to the bathroom sick at my stomach I am at risk of losing my job for performance reasons. So by the time I can get in to have injections done I will no longer have insurance.

So I tried eating toast for dinner, no success. Another call to my gastro doc will be made tomorrow. When coke and sprite in tiny sips is all I keep down there is definitely something wrong and don't tell me otherwise or I will find another doctor. I have done it before and I will do it again.

My brother pointed it out to me that if I wanted to be technicL about it, since I don't really keep down anything I eat, I have technically Only "eaten" since the first week of march. Yep that's right march. Everyday since then I vomit after everything I eat. Very liitle food stays down. Saltine crackers but only 2. If I eat 3, forget it.

Well enough of my rant. Just thought I would let y'all know my Botox was approved. Back to work I go tomorrow. Not gonna be fun. I'm so weak and dizzy not to mention the pain but y'all know how that is.

Right now I feel like giving up. No one at work understands me, my family tries but lately it annoys me (is that bad of me?), and lately I am just angry and confused all at the same time. I'm so tired of being sick and having to give up on dreams and not getting to do things I should be doing because I am sick. THIS JUST SUCKS !