What is the worst thing anyone has or can say to you about migraine?

Hi All,

I am working on a blog post entitled "The worst things you can say to a chronic migraneur" and I need some help. I have a few, but I would love to hear your stories as well.

Here is my list so far:

1. Migraines, they have treatments for that now.
2. Headaches happen
3. Have you tried aspirin?
4. You shouldn't be allowed in school with migraine.
5. Get over it.

Look forward to hearing your answers. Thanks in advance for helping.

Pain free days
sailingm

From my current neuro: "Well, at least it is not life-threatening."

"have you heard about that new drug, imitrex?"

my response, (unspoken): "ye gods, that came out 18 years ago. of course i haven't heard of it, not with the millions of print and tv ads about it over the years." dianne
"

"oh, what caused THIS one?" If I knew, I wouldn't have them.

"have you tried seeing a different doctor" Several.

"there are lots of treatment out there for migraine now" Yup, tried them.

"have you tried researching on the internet to see how to stop them" Gee, I wish I had thought of that!

sailingmuffin wrote:Hi All,

"The worst things you can say to a chronic migraneur"

After a month of daily migraines - "That hair colour doesn't go with your complexion, you look like a whore."

Have you googled migraine?

Oh, I just put a smile on my face and work through it (sister...ugh)

Drink a margarita (sister)

My ex husband used to tell me it was ' all in my head'
Yes it was....
So after 3 years i divorced the stupid excuse for a human being.

A quack neurologist at one of the hospitals that treated me tried to imply that it was "more in my head."

That quickly invoked a serious of questions by my father to the doctor..."so, what you're saying is, my son is malingering?"

The doctor had a seriously hard time of backing out of his statement and had to apologize.

But to sailing's #5...."Get over it."

I'll be the contrarian....I actually believe in part of this. Part of dealing with migraine is accepting, coping, and adapting. It's truly not the kindest phrase--but once you think about it, and can wrap your brain around the message it does have meaning.

From my SIL...
"Get a job and get over it!"

Sure...I'll get right on that...

Pretty much any reply except " I'm so sorry to hear that. Is there anything I can do to help?"
While there generally is not, that is the only polite answer to someone's illness or pain.

Not to poopoo it, or recite cures for an illness you know little about, or demand answers from the ill person, or cast blame on that person. All those responses just add insult to injury, or require the ill person to justify or try to explain their problem when they really haven't got those answers. Please everyone out there just learn the above phrase. Maybe Dear Abby would post it as a general service to us all.

Your not doing enough to help yourself - Doctor at Pain Clinc.

Have you tried {insert over-the-counter drug name}? That's what I take - Said by too many people to count.

I don't like taking pain pills - Said by too many people to count.

Get over it - Idiot relative (not said directly to me, good thing).

He's a drug addict - Same idiot relative (not said directly to me, a VERY good thing).

From husband: Maybe if you just stop thinking about it all the time, it would go away.
Cindy

"I thought bright lights helped migraines" (said by my school principal when asked why I was teaching my class with the lights off one day.)

Well you're 'due' a migraine soon anyway aren't you? (husband)

I know someone who let Jesus into her life and her migraines vanished (friend)

Just a couple.. so many...

LHx

Many times I get the following question/phrase when I'm experiencing the aura or having a migraine:
"Why don't you stop being such a loner and make some friends?"
I don't know, why don't you take my defective 19th chromosomes (all 4 trillion of them) and replace them with genes that work properly?