Today is our 39th Wedding Anniversary

And we should have been up north with my friend.
You will know by now, I failed. My head was unrelenting.
I have also pulled a muscle in my neck which is very painful.

So here we are, no trip. That's 3 years now I havent been more than a half hour from home.
Pathetic isnt it...

The weather is as it was the day we married. Warm and sunny.
My girls have bought us cards and choccies.
My son has apparently bought us a card, but we will not now be getting it,
because although we had his children at a moments notice yesterday....
He came and got them, but forgot the card.
But hey, I still dont have an invite to my grandson's Christening in 3 weeks time...

So I have caught up with the laundry and hung it out.
My husband has gone to the store for something he can cook for dinner.

It isnt the day I planned, but at the moment I dont have a migraine, just my usual, and the sun is shining,.

Happy Anniversary, Pen! I hope the migraine gives you a break for the entire day so you can enjoy it with your hubby. Please take care.

I'm glad you're not in pain.

Oh, how our children can hurt us with their little thoughtlessness. They take advantage of our unconditional love.

Thanks. I am in pain
How quickly things change with me.....i hung out the laundry and now I have a nasty head.
It isnt a full migraine, but it has brought me down....and I was quite up...

Thanks though.
Pen

Happy anniversary!

Wow, I am 39 and you have been married to your husband for 39 years. That's what I call a love story.
I am so sorry to hear that you did not manage to go on your trip. What a bummer. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Your son is a bit of a noddy for forgetting to bring your card. Shame on him. Next time he dumps his kids on his sick mother you might just remind him of it.

At least you have got a loving hubby who is going to cook a nice meal for you. Enjoy the evening with him. This day is about you and him after all.

Love

P.

My son is often a disappointment. He is my first born, my only son and I love him to bits. We used to be so close and he was with his sisters. But he took him a wife, and now she take priority. It is a lot about her family and much less about ours. We see the kids about 2 hours every 3 weeks, and they only live 20 minutes away.....
Sadly this is a common occurrence I have learned from other mothers of sons.
What is that saying about a sons a son.....a daughters a daughter...Well I have yet to put it to the test as his sisters are both single, but we shall see.

My good friend Eleanor whom I have failed to visit this week told me 10 years ago. "No one prepares you for how much your son might hurt you". I didnt believe her.....
He works long hours and doesnt get much time with his kids, but she insists on working as well and we have to try to fit in, but we are not "factored" in. So we often miss out .

Yes I am disappointed in my son, and the only consolation is that I have learned from many others that it is far from uncommon behaviour in one of his age/generation.

My husband is now in the kitchen cooking us a meal, (I do love his saute potatoes). And he came back from shopping with flowers for us.
He drives me nuts a lot of the time, as I am sure I do him. But I might at least keep him until next September when I hope to be well enough to have a small celebration....(well you never know!!!)

Yes, I know from my circle of friends that the parents of the husbands often miss out. The wives take control and its all about their families.

Sons are also usually the ones who are shirking their responsibilities when it comes to looking after their elderly parents while it is their sisters who do all the caring.

My in-laws are lucky. It is all about them. My own parents are strangers to me. I regard my in-laws as my parents and they regard me as their daughter. I consider myself very lucky. It just confirms that blood is not always thicker than water.

If you where my mother in-law I would not discriminate against you either. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Enjoy the potatoes!

P.

I hope you managed to enjoy your anniversary, Pen.

When you notice some people who have their grandchildren around, take note if they are their daughter's or their son's children. I suppose we women probably favored our families over our in-laws....in other words, when the parents of daughters get lots of attention, it probably means the son's parents are all alone.

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Happy Anniversary

Pen, an many many more happy years together!

Risa

My son is often a disappointment. He is my first born, my only son and I love him to bits. We used to be so close and he was with his sisters. But he took him a wife, and now she take priority. It is a lot about her family and much less about ours.

Pen, I apologize for taking this issue in your anniversary thread, but this is so serious I can not let it without comment.

Pen, isn't the wife supposed to be a priority for a husband?
How would you feel if you were playing second fiddle to your own husband, his mother and his family more important that you?

We never EVER have, raise our children for ourselves.
In this one aspect the Bible is so true - the woman bears children only to watch them go once they get married.
Cruel, but true. And HEALTHY.


So, your son is absolutely right that he puts his wife first before he does family as his wife should put him first before hers, and I am surprised you, if I am not mistaken, a psychologist seem to forget that?

Risa

Happy anniversary, Pen

hope your pain managed to ease for you to enjoy your meal. it is a sad factor of living with migraines that we miss out on so many special occasions, with 5out of the 7 of my sibling getting migraines we have never all managed to be at one of the sbilings weddings together. i lost out on so much of my wedding day and honeymoon with migriane.
having a son i am taking note of all the comments and know it is right that when he marries his wife will take first place over me, but it is unkind to use parents to babysit andnot realise the hurt of forgetting a card. pen does he know how dissapointed you are in not being able to get away, you need to sit down and chat and tell him, then you willbeable to really offload the hurt. youre right on for the big one next year tho and have a focus point to aim for! this yr could bring a lot of good improvements for you with botox maybe and who knows.....???

been up alll night savage stomach upset. Still going on.
Tiggered migraine.
Will respond. Can't on this phone.
P

congrats Pen!

hope you feel better soon.

Pen,

Congrats on the anniversary. Sorry you feel so rotten but I hope you were able to enjoy the lovely dinner.

As for the children...Risa has a point but when it comes to parents, I would hope that I would be able to spend equal time with each set. But I know my mother would take a bit of priority. No matter how welcoming the in-laws, they aren't your parents and your own mother knows her daughter best. I know this isn't always the case but looking at it from someone closer to your kids age...take it for what it's worth. But at least you do get some time with the grandbabies even though you wish for more. But on the other hand, could your health take them? That might be a factor whether it's conscious or not that Mother just can't do it or we can't take the kids to her because she's so ill.