Sorry for my absense

I want to appologize to everyone for not being around more often lately. I've had my hands full these past few months. In December I discovered my daughter had been cutting herself to relieve her depression. We got her in to see a doctor that they put her on antidepressants. My hubby and I thought she was doing okay, until i found her diary. I won't go into details only that the things she said inside of it alerted us to the danger she might pose on not only us but her classmates. She made threats that we feared she might follow through with. This was the end of February. We immediatly got her in to see her doctor who decided she needed to be hospitalized in a mental facility.

The hardest thing i ever had to do was leave my daughter in that facility but it was the best thing we could have ever done for her. She got the help she needed and on top of it was diagnosed with Apsergers Syndrome. She was in the facility for four days, went through therapy, helped her to deal with ehr stress, her temper and her depression as well as cope with her new illness. She is far from cured, and has a long road ahead of her but she is doing so much better than she had been before the hospitalization.

So my priorities have been helping her cope and heal as well as making sure my middle son was managing his siters illness all right. He has the, "how come i'm normal" guilt. For those that don't know, my oldest son is Bipolar and we've had a rough road with him and his illness. So my middle son is the only child who doesn't suffer from a mental illness.

In the mean time, we've been going to multiple doctor appointments, phsyciatrist and pshycologist as well as group therapy. Everything else had been put on hold and is only now starting to get back to somewhat normal. I just wanted to let you all know why i haven;t been aound much.

Hello Sheila

Glad to see you back. So sorry you are going through this, but it is good that you are getting to the bottom of it. Mental illness is such a tough thing to deal with. My prayers to you and your family.

Angela

Hey Sheila, sounds like you have been having a tough time for a long time now.

I just want to let you know you can PM me if you have some qusetions about mental health and want a straight forward answer from a mental health professional.

Hang in there, all three of your kids can find stability and lead the life you wish for them.

My, that is a lot to work with. I hope things settle down for you and your family.

Shiela,
you have all my sympathy and support. Dealing with psychiatric disease requires a lot of energy and care. I have only an indirect experience with a borderline colleague, so I guess how intense it must be with a family member...

You did the right things at the right moment. Too many parents just close their eyes and deny psycological/psychiatric problems because it's too difficult to face them.

Thanks for finding the time to show up at Ronda's!

aaaw Shiela I had no idea. How terrible you must have suffered with all this, I can only imagine.
My heart goes out to you.
I can only imagine how heartbreaking, mind numbing experience must be having to leave your child in such a place
not knowing what to expect and probably having her blaming you and asking how could you do that to her.
But you did the right thing, you knew that of course right away what needs to be done - being a great mother
as you are. being mother is not always all roses and honey.

You have my deepest sympathy, sweet friend, and please don't feel bad in the least for not being able to be here,
people stop coming to the forums simply because they got bored with them and you -you had so much
on your plate. no apologies necessary, nor due.

I hope things will go slowly but surely back to normal, dear friend, and we will have your terrific company once again more often here on Ronda's.

hugs Risa

Aw, thanks for all the support and understanding everyone. It means a lot.

Ivy: My own depression was overlooked by my family and I swore I would never treat my own children that way. I never let anyone talk me out of getting my oldest son help and the same went for my daughter.

AZ: Things are starting to settle now, thanks.

Milo: Thanks for the offer of help. It's greatly appreciated. What field of mental health do you work in?

Angela: Thanks for the prayers. Having been through the rough patches with my son no way prepared me for dealing with my daughters illness. Its hard enough to see one child suffer but two...very tough.

Risa: You are such a dear! The one thing that told me I was doing the right thing was hearing my daughter say she needed help. She knew she was spiralling down but didn;t know how to stop it. She doesn't blame us for hospitalizing her, thankfully. she wanted to get better and was tired of feeling the way she did so when we took her to the hospital, she knew it was for the best. Still, it was ot an easy time for any of us, but in the end, it did a world of good.

Glad things are starting to look up for you Sheila.

I can only imagine how hard it is on families with those types of health problems. Just know you're doing the right thing, even if it seems hard. We're here for you and understand if you disappear to take care of your family. Just pop back in when you can.

Becky

I hope you are well and your family the best. I am glad to see you.

Lillian

s....I did six years in acute and the last five in adult community.

Shiela, Apology!!! I dont think so. You are having quite a time of it.
We miss you, but you need to do what you need to do.
I hope things are easier for you soon.

Pen

So much to deal with. Will pray for you all. And yes you were missed. I know it can be hard dealing with a childs problems. My son is clean now but for how long. We can only do so much. Glad you found things out in time to get help. Take care. Billy

Dear Shiela,

Wow, that is quite a lot to deal with. I wish you all the strength in the world in order to oversee the recovery of your children. I am glad to know you see how it is affecting your middle child, too. I can imagine a child in his position might feel neglected and/or wonder when he might find a problem within himself.

Just a suggestion: perhaps it would be good to set aside time for your middle child. With the other two needing your help (and I am sure you are doing your absolute best for them) your son might need to know he is on your mind, also.

Of course, you are probably doing all of this already. I just thought I'd make the suggestion since I am not in the middle of things as you are. I can imagine being wiped out from taking care of the needs of your other two and possibly relying on the healthy child to take care of himself.

I hope you're also finding time to take care of yourself. Please let me know if there's anything I can do remotely. Perhaps you need someone to do online searches for things. I am not employed and perfectly willing to help in this way if needed.

Sheila, I will keep your entire family in my prayers. I can only imagine how difficult these past months have been for your entire family, and most especially you, with a mother's heart.

Thanks for letting us know so that we can rally around you with our support and prayers.

Please take care.

Sheila,
I am glad to see you back on here. I had been wondering where you had run off to. I am o glad that you are so attuned to your children an can be a help for them . I had terrible depression as a teenager. It was a rotten thing for us all to have to deal with. Your kids are lucky to have your love and support.

How has your head been through all of this?

Mary Anne

I suffered from depression in my youth that wasn;t treated until I was much older, so I know the signs. I was determined not to have my children suffer the way I did.

My head has been acting up through all of this, but not just from the stress but being under florescent lights all the time. That's one of triggers and of course, every doctors office, hospital and clinic have florescent lights. Sigh....

MaryAnneLive wrote:Sheila,
I am glad to see you back on here. I had been wondering where you had run off to. I am o glad that you are so attuned to your children an can be a help for them . I had terrible depression as a teenager. It was a rotten thing for us all to have to deal with. Your kids are lucky to have your love and support.

How has your head been through all of this?

Mary Anne