emotional disaster

Lately my emotions are swinging wildly from thinking I can handle the impact of the migraines on my life to wanting to swallow a bunch of pills..............I know the migraines cause biochemical changes in my brain but could really use a break now and then. Just needed to say it.........Leslie

I understand the feeling, Leslie. I'm also grateful to have this forum to be able to express those thoughts. Awhile back we had a thread on how we have to be VERY careful about who we mention that to. None of us want and involuntary commit!

Hubby and son know that it crosses my mind but I seldom mention it because it makes them very nervous and hubby starts to hover.

Do you have trouble around the holidays? My emotions are very uneven Nov. - Dec. The anniversaries of both parents deaths, the stress of decorating, shopping, cooking etc. I limit it as much as possible but still find myself heading down the path to my " dark place". Especially when the Ms or other health issues keep me from doing something I want to do.

I'm not sure how rational it is, but knowing that I have the choice of how long I'm going to deal with this gives me the strength to go on. I know I'm treading on sensitive ground...be gentle. I'm just trying to be open about my feelings, not advocating anything. Just raw emotion.

You said it well. I have my days where I feel like I can take on the world. And then it hits me, the PAIN. The only thing I can do is to keep telling myself to hang on, a break will come. It may not come for days, even weeks but it does always come. Sometimes the break only last a day or two but when they come that is what I hold onto. We all have to do that.

HANG IN THERE. STAY STRONG. STAY POSITIVE. STAY HOPEFULL. STAY CALM.

You poor thing. I too can empathise with how you're feeling. The migraines wreak havoc with our brains and our lives. Sometimes the impact is overwhelming. But . . . there is light at the end of the tunnel, even though we may not be able to see it yet. I've met quite a few people of my mother's generation (in their 80's ish but not saying we'll have to wait that long!) who tell me they used to be like this, so hopefully we too will be able to look back and think thank goodness for that.

Take care
Liz

I am so sorry you are in such distress, Leslie. Knowing that being depressed is a part of the migraine syndrome, does not make it any easier when it catches you up, grips you and makes you feel helpless and useless. We all know how it can feel - but we cannot know how you feel, so we can only offer you our best wishes and support, and try to stay with you until you feel better.

One thing you must realise now and this is that this feeling will NOT last. All you need to is to remind yourself of that fact, and to repeat this to yoruself like a mantra:
it will pass,
it will pass,
it will pass.
Hold onto it, and beat your poor suffering brain with it, add full force of anger to it, if you need to.Being angry helps at times to pull you our of such feelings.
It will pass.
You are just going through a rough patch Leslie. It will pass.

One thought occured to me - have you perhaps recently changed any medictaions, or combination of mediactions? It is possible that you might be suffering some new s/e and this is making you fell more depressed. Many medicines do. Please check, and see if there is something you can do in this respect.

And hold on - you have this wonderful sweet little baby in your arms, hold onto that.
Your family loves you.
They need you, sick or not.
They need you, and that ghastly feeling will pass.

http://throughthewordsofchronicpain.blogspot.com/2010/11/how-can-you-develop-positive-attitude.html

Article I wrote talking about this. Not sure if you have seen it. Hope it helps a little.

I'm so sorry. At least you have a community here who understands. When you are at that point, please come to us. We get it and can offer understanding.

Hang in there, I know it gets bleak but there is a light of hope out there and this too shall pass.

I appreciate the wonderful responses..........remembering that it will pass is so important and not something that I am very good at when in the middle of the doom and gloom. I don't take regular meds for my migraines so pretty sure the depression comes from the migraines themselves. And mini, the cute little baby in my arms in my photo is my first grandchild who I get to hold again in two days! I am so thankful for this community. Leslie

Leslie,

Pain does such horrid things to us and depression is one of the nasty things. That's why this is so hard. If we just had to deal with the symptoms themselves, this would be so much easier but its all the mental and emotional stuff that comes too.

Enjoy that grandbaby.

I saw my therapist today and she encouraged me ( again ) esp. during the holidays to take time to be at peace. It seems this requires practice on my part! She wants me to take time each day to "be in the moment" and enjoy the leaves falling, kitties purring, whatever is around me that I might me to busy or to sick to notice. In time, she assures me, this will become more of a habit. Perhaps this will help you! I hope so! Aren't grandbabies the best? Ours is 2 and we adore him...

I am so happy to see you visiting again - I was thinking about and how you are.
There is nothing, nothing in the world that lifts your spirit as much a Darling, Precious Baby.

I surround myself by pictures of my family as children (which I take all the time) and they really help when things get difficult. Have a great visit, and come back and tell us how you are.